Tuesday, November 30, 2010

The Adventurous Housewife


Would someone PLEASE revoke my debit card, because a roundtrip ticket from Dallas to Rome is currently $586 a person.

I woke my napping husband and practically begged him to request time off from his work as soon as possible so I can book a ticket to SOMEWHERE, for crying out loud.

But he says no. He recently requested two weeks off for Christmas, and he says my anxious butt will just have to wait.

I'm as angsty and impatient as a four year old on Christmas Eve right about now, because we've been planning a vacation to Europe in the spring for several weeks and in that time the tickets have already shot up 15% and the cheapest multi-city ticket to be found between Dallas, Dublin and London is somewhere over $900.

I've done a lot of ticket pricing in my short life. I've been a few places, too, but more than that I watch. For the sake of watching. Just to know. I'll admit, it's also because it kind of feels like I'm going somewhere. But it's good to do if you're that tricky combination of frugal and traveler. But when it comes down to it it's probably my least favorite part. You know, the part where you don't have a crystal ball. What will you do next, Mr. Ticket? Will you raise? Will you drop? When will you raise and when will you drop? You see, they say that two months prior to the date is the best time to buy your ticket. Little do they know that one month prior to that, the tickets are often as much as a couple hundred dollars cheaper. So the only certainty to this gamble is that there is none. It all depends. How I hate those three little words.

As I've said, that's what I love least about travel. Other than the excruciating indigestion I seem to get on a plane, it's probably the only thing I don't love. I spent a couple hours today just looking for the cheapest bed and breakfast from Cork, Ireland to London. That's a lot of looking. But that's my travel-agent high.

By the way, please never go to a travel agent. Unless you're looking to for manure. Because they're full of it. I knew that no one was better at finding the best deals than yourself and Google, but while planning my honeymoon a few people urged me to see what a travel agency had to offer. I walked in the room, sat my engaged butt down, told the woman I wanted to go to Paris on $2,400 and she looked at me as if I just drank a gallon of gasoline then smiled. "$2,400... a person, right?" "Yeahh no. $2,400 total." She laughed in my face. Go ahead and laugh it up because I took my $2,400, had my honeymoon and came back with a few hundred to spare. I have half a mind to go back to that travel agency, find that woman's boss and tell them that they'd be better off replacing her with a teenager.

Long story short, I am ready to GO. I just want to buy an overpriced ticket to some random far off place so I can spend lots more money already. Is that so much to ask? Then the real dreaming can begin: What obstacles will we face? How will I react to the old couple who stole my window seat on the plane THIS time? What movie will I watch on the way there? How many times will we get lost? What will I order on the menu that makes my husband say I'm disgusting and makes me tell him he needs to experience the culture? Will it be one of those places where we tell each other we'll live there someday just to make getting on the plane to go home a little easier? What picture will I take that will trigger flashes of memories from the entire trip every time I look at that one shot? Because there's always one of those pictures in every trip...

I probably shouldn't be building my hopes like this. My husband already casually suggested we forget the whole thing and buy a sleep number. My dreams = his sleep number. Of course, he also said we could just stay home and google satellite the United Kingdom. Ok, honey...

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